Monday, 9 June 2014

What it means to be eighteen

... Well I can't say for sure honestly, possibly because I haven't quite relished all that this age entitles me to do. But what it felt when people said, "omg happy birthday you're finally legal yea!", it feels quite the same to me. Not because people don't usually take me for my age (HAHA) but because I don't actually feel any older, any wiser, any bigger (no pun intended) for that matter.

I had however, some sort of epiphany a few days ago that I'm only 2 years short of being 20, 3 good years short of reaching official adulthood - I inevitably started thinking about what it really means to be stepping into this stage of reality - and I came to a conclusion: responsibility. I made a mental vow to rely less on my parents and if anything, endeavour to reciprocate and even give more, for all that I truthfully, do not deserve based on my treatment of and neglect for them sometimes. So besides the fact that wow, I can now flash my IC and gain legitimate clearance into M18 movies, to buy alcohol, clubs and even start learning how to drive (even if people don't believe me heh), I feel it isn't an entirely BIG matter hahaha. It's not afterall a true recognition of your maturity isn't it? 

I've had a really memorable and blessed birthday however, the best yet! Travelled all the way to the East for our class BBQ last Friday after Sports Carnival, cycled after eons and this pure feeling of temporary liberation was one to indulge in, I'm actually longing for it to return so badly. So anyway, my lovely classmates celebrated my birthday when I came back from cycling and I think it was due to the abruptness of it that I was taken by surprise! But I really really appreciate what they did for me, well even going to the extent to print a disgusting unglam of me and pasting it on a balloon HAHAHA 

I'm really glad we all enjoyed ourselves during the BBQ, everyone was especially high and boy I wonder why ;) we basically spent the time eating, talking, and fooling around and I haven't had so much fun in a while. Also, I think I'm addicted to sniffing the Yankee candle the girls got me. 

I'm generally not a receiver of many presents actually and honestly I'm fine with that because well-wishes and messages mean much more to me. Notes especially are a priced possession to me, because they're such a pleasure to read. The biggest gift however, came as a huge surprise - from my dear secondary school friends. I still can't get over the fact that I incredulously did not suspect a single thing, even after some myterious pizza arrived at our house early; I was completely fooled by my mom who said that it was for dinner, and I believed her because we do order in quite often and that day we were making bazhangs and my mom didn't have the time to make dinner. Later in the evening, my mom told me to shower, we're going out for dinner and I asked about the pizza. She said that oh, that's for supper and when I asked "So much for supper?!?" she replied: "your brother eats a lot you know?" and that's just what it took to get me convinced 

So I came out of the shower looking absolutely unglamorous in my glasses, my hair still caught in a wet mess of tangles, a towel draped over my shoulders and my mom told me to keep the pizza in the fridge to keep it "fresh". When I walked out into the dining area, it was dark - there was a cake on the table with candles lit and College of the Demented just sprung out from behind the sofa to surprise me. I was genuinely, shocked and till now still reeling from it :') I completely did not expect it because we're all so busy that we hardly ever get to meet, let alone celebrate our birthdays together and to receive this is just an amazing feeling. What did I do to deserve such sweet friends! Can't express enough how much I love you guys ♡♡

Thank you so much to everyone who has made my 18th birthday a one worth remembering. To my classmates too who played a part in the surprise ;) I am unbelievably gullible omg. 

On a side note, June holidays are here. And to anyone who's disappointed with their mid year results like I am, press on, you're not alone! And I know many of us are caught in a schism between studying and what constitutes as resting... but ah well time to prioritise studying, as if it hasn't been a priority since forever. 

Happy holidays! 

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